How To Tell Your Partner You Want A Threesome

When is National Threesome Day and What is it?

National Threesome Day, marked on March 3rd annually, advocates for open communication and exploration within consensual adult relationships. By designating a day to discuss and possibly engage in threesomes, National Threesome Day encourages couples and individuals to navigate the often-taboo topic, and serves as a reminder that consensual exploration can bring partners closer and deepen the bonds of intimacy.

What is a Threesome?

A threesome involves three consenting adults engaging in sexual activities together. From casual encounters to more structured arrangements within polyamorous relationships, threesomes are a reflection of different desires and preferences.

The concept of a threesome is a celebration of sexual openness and exploration. By understanding the nuances of threesomes, individuals and couples can navigate this terrain with respect for each other's boundaries, creating an environment where shared experiences can strengthen the fabric of their relationships.

Why Do People Want Threesomes?

The desire for threesomes is often the result of sexual fantasies and the thrill of exploring uncharted territories. For many, the idea of a threesome is invigorating, offering a break from routine and a chance to fulfil longstanding fantasies.

However, for those practicing polyamory, threesomes can be a natural extension of their relationship dynamics, providing opportunities for deeper connections and shared experiences that contribute to the growth of the relationship.

Understanding the motivations behind the desire for threesomes is crucial in fostering open and honest communication between partners. By recognising and respecting each other's fantasies and boundaries, couples can navigate the exploration of threesomes in a way that enhances their connection.

What To Do If Your Partner Wants a Threesome

When your partner expresses a desire for a threesome, it can evoke a range of emotions, from surprise to uncertainty. Initiate a conversation that is non-judgmental and honest, creating a safe space for both of you to express your thoughts and feelings.

Begin the discussion by acknowledging the emotional complexity of the topic. Express your feelings and encourage your partner to do the same. This initial exchange sets the tone for a more profound understanding of each other's desires and concerns. Share your boundaries openly and be receptive to your partner's limits as well.

As the conversation unfolds, explore the motivations behind the desire for a threesome. This is an opportunity to consider each other's fantasies, which can deepen your connection by understanding desires that may have previously remained unspoken. Be patient and receptive, allowing the dialogue to evolve naturally.

How To Persuade Your Partner to Have a Threesome

If your partner is hesitant, it's essential to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding. Acknowledge their feelings and concerns, and avoid pressuring or coercing them. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of the experience, emphasising trust, communication, and shared desires. Gradual exposure to the idea, perhaps through discussing fantasies or introducing erotic literature, can help ease the transition.

Remember that you can’t force the idea of a threesome on your partner and if they do say no, consider revisiting the conversation later to talk more about their discomfort or why a threesome is completely off the board for them.

Different Types of Threesomes

Threesomes come in various forms, and work well with a variety of preferences and comfort levels. From FFM (female-female-male) to MMF (male-male-female) and more configurations, each type offers a unique dynamic. Understanding each arrangement and communicating openly about preferences can contribute to a positive experience for all parties involved.

Before you engage in a threesome, ensure that you understand your partners’ gender identities and ask about preferred names for their anatomy. Trans and non-binary individuals may not care for the names their anatomy is given at birth pre-physical transition, and you should be empathetic about this. A simple conversation now can help prevent any hurt feelings.

How to Pick a Threesome Partner

Choosing the right partner is a fundamental step in ensuring the success and satisfaction of a threesome experience. The process begins with open communication among all parties involved, establishing clear boundaries, expectations, and preferences. These discussions should include the physical aspects of the encounter and the emotional and psychological components.

Approaching a potential third party requires a delicate balance of respect and transparency. Honesty about your intentions is crucial, as it establishes a foundation of trust and understanding from the outset. Clearly articulate what you and your partner are seeking from the experience and listen attentively to the prospective partner's expectations as well.

Prioritising consent and comfort throughout the selection process is essential. Once you’ve been told no, move on. If the yes is enthusiastic, you’ve found your third!

Using Sex Toys During Threesomes

Incorporating sex toys into a threesome can improve the pleasure and intensity of the experience for all participants involved. From vibrators to cock rings, the array of toys available allows for a customised exploration of desires and shared intimacy.

Vibrators can be added to various scenarios; their ability to target erogenous zones ensures that you can achieve a heightened sense of pleasure, contributing to a more fulfilling and satisfying encounter. The use of vibrators can be particularly beneficial in assisting all involved with their pleasure-seeking.

Cock rings are another popular addition to threesomes, as they can enhance and prolong erections, contributing to a more prolonged and satisfying experience for everyone. When selecting sex toys for a threesome, it's crucial to engage in open communication about preferences and boundaries. Discussing the types of toys that intrigue and excite each participant ensures that the chosen additions align with everyone's comfort levels.

Maintaining a hygienic environment is vital when adding sex toys to a threesome. Regularly cleaning and sterilising all toys before and after use is essential to prevent the spread of bacteria and ensure a safe and enjoyable experience for everyone involved.

Why Doesn't My Partner Want a Threesome?

If your partner is not comfortable with the idea of a threesome, it's crucial to respect their feelings. Rejection doesn't necessarily reflect a lack of love or attraction; it may be rooted in personal boundaries or past experiences. Approach the conversation with empathy, and be open to exploring alternative ways to keep the intimacy alive in your relationship.

National Threesome Day is a reminder that open communication, trust, and consent are essential in any relationship. Whether you decide to engage in a threesome or not, the day encourages healthy discussions about desires and boundaries, which can create stronger connections between partners. Remember, every relationship is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. For more relationship advice and guides on the use of various sex toys, visit our blog.